As Reported

The Pastor entered his donkey in a race and it won !!
The Pastor was so pleased with the donkey that he entered it in the next race, and it won that race too.
The local paper read:
PASTOR'S ASS OUT FRONT.
The Bishop was so upset with this kind of publicity that he ordered the Pastor not to enter the donkey in another races.
The next day the local paper headline read:
“BISHOP SCRATCHES PASTOR'S ASS”.
This was too much for the Bishop, so he ordered the Pastor to get rid of the donkey.
The Pastor decided to give it to a Nun in a nearby convent.
The local paper, hearing of the news, posted the following headline the next day:
"NUN HAS BEST ASS IN TOWN" !!
The Bishop fainted ….
He informed the Nun that she would have to get rid of the donkey as soon as possible, so she sold it to a local farmer for £10.
The next day the paper read:
“NUN SELLS ASS FOR £10”.
This was too much for the Bishop so he ordered the Nun to buy back the donkey, and take it to the plains where it could run wild.
The next day the headlines read:
"NUN ANNOUNCES HER ASS IS WILD AND FREE".
The Bishop was buried the next day.
The moral of the story is .. . . being concerned about public opinion can bring you much grief and misery, even shorten your life.
So be yourself and enjoy life. Stop worrying about everyone else's ass and you'll be a lot happier and live longer!

The following is apparently a letter to the editor of the Chicago Tribune

Dear Mr. Page: I agree with our Native American population. I am highly jilted by the racially charged name of the Washington Redskins.

One might argue that to name a professional football team after Native Americans would exalt them as fine warriors, but nay, nay. We must be careful not to offend, and in the spirit of political correctness and courtesy, we must move forward.

Let's ditch the Kansas City Chiefs, the Atlanta Braves and the Cleveland Indians. If your shorts are in a wad because of the reference the name Redskins makes to skin color, then we need to get rid of the Cleveland Browns.

The Carolina Panthers obviously were named to keep the memory of militant Blacks from the 60's alive. Gone. It's offensive to us white folk.

The New York Yankees offend the Southern population. Do you see a team named for the Confederacy? No! There is no room for any reference to that tragic war that cost this country so many young men's lives. I am also offended by the blatant references to the Catholic religion among our sports team names. Totally inappropriate to have the New Orleans Saints, the Los Angeles Angels or the San Diego Padres.

Then there are the team names that glorify criminals who raped and pillaged. We are talking about the horrible Oakland Raiders, the Minnesota Vikings, the Tampa Bay Buccaneers and the Pittsburgh Pirates!

Now, let us address those teams that clearly send the wrong message to our children. The San Diego Chargers promote irresponsible fighting or even spending habits. Wrong message to our children.

The New York Giants and the San Francisco Giants promote obesity, a growing childhood epidemic. Wrong message to our children. The Cincinnati Reds promote downers/barbiturates. Wrong message to our children.
The Milwaukee Brewers. Well that goes without saying. Wrong message to our children.

So, there you go. We need to support any legislation that comes out to rectify this travesty, because the government will likely become involved with this issue, as they should. Just the kind of thing the do-nothing Congress loves.

As a die-hard Oregon State fan, my wife and I, with all of this in mind, suggest it might also make some sense to change the name of the Oregon State women's athletic teams to something other than "the Beavers (especially when they play Southern California. Do we really want the Trojans sticking it to the Beavers???

I always love your articles and I generally agree with them. As for the Redskins name I would suggest they change the name to the "Foreskins" to better represent their community, paying tribute to the dick heads in Washington DC.

 

On a more serious note

Imagine being an idiot in the WW2 Blitz refusing the blackout your windows in order to stop the neighbourhood being bombed, because you didn’t want to be told what to do by the government.