Sunday 20 May 2018

When Tom got it badly wrong

Is it over… can I come out from under the bed?  Best of luck Harry!


Hi  Jan here, I thought I’d share this with you……

Last night Tom and I were dressed and ready to go out for a lovely evening of dinner and theatre.  This is something extremely rare for him (buying me dinner).  Anyway, having been burgled in the past, we turned on a 'night light' and the answering machine, then put the cat in the backyard. When our taxi arrived, we walked out our front door and our rather tubby cat (takes after Tom) scooted between our legs and back inside. Because our cat likes to chase the budgie we really didn't want to leave them unchaperoned so Tom ran inside to retrieve her and put her in the back yard again.


I didn't want the taxi driver to know our house was going to be empty all evening and explained to him that my husband would be out momentarily as he was just bidding goodnight to my mother.  A few minutes later he got into the cab all hot and bothered, and said (to my growing horror and amusement) as the cab pulled away.


"Sorry it took so long but the stupid bitch was hiding under the bed and I had to poke her bum with a coat hanger to get her to come out! She tried to take off so I grabbed her by the neck and wrapped her in a blanket to prevent her scratching me like she did last time. But it worked!   I hauled her fat arse down the stairs and threw her into the backyard....she had better not cr@p in the vegetable garden again."


The silence in the taxi was deafening.....

8 comments :

Paul (from Waterway Routes) said...

Hi Jan. The best bog post I've read for a long time. Please can we have more "guest" postings from you.

Diane and Ray said...

Funniest blog for a while, made us laugh Jan. D &R

Tom and Jan said...

Paul you traitor! I've written all the blog posts since the very beginning and now Jan has one post and you can't sing her praises high enough!

Ade said...

Brilliant Jan,, madeI laugh xx
More guest blogs please.
Cheers
Ade

Judith nb Serena said...

Wonderful post Jan, more please.
Judith nb Serena

Brian and Diana on NB Harnser said...

It even made Diana laugh and she never sees the funny side of things

Mrs. Jaqueline Biggs said...

Bwaahahahaha!!!! What a great post Jan! I'm pleased to read Tom, that you managed to get the old girl under control!

Love Jaq xxx

Unknown said...

HOOT!